Wednesday, July 24, 2019

The Think Seat


A week ago Sunday I came home from church to discover that the toilet seat had been cracked. The story behind it is a little vague, ranging from blaming it on daddy, to the dog climbing on it, to ninjas while we were at church... the longer I listened to the reasons, the more fantastical the stories became. My children are amazing when it comes to figuring out how things came to be. They may not be very accurate, but they sure are entertaining! The fact of the matter remained, however, that we needed to buy a new toilet seat, or be brutally pinched every time anyone had a "think session" in the bathroom.

Check! Toilet seat arrived, I installed it, and we all went along our merry way. We got a fancy-schmancy potty training seat with a slam proof lid so hopefully that will prevent any future cracked seat problems. Just in case it wasn't actually done by ninjas while we were at church. I like to cover all my bases.

And so imagine my shock when just this past Sunday, as in 3 days ago, my same toilet that has had a new seat for just a few days, suddenly started malfunctioning. As in the water began rising instead of draining. It was very much an "Oh crap" moment because it was 2 in the morning. But it didn't go over the edge and it went back down and Jeffrey grabbed the plunger and said that he fixed it so we went back to sleep.

The next morning the 2 am fiasco had been forgotten about and Jeffrey went along his merry way and 6 people cannot feasibly share 1 bathroom so my bathroom was once again in use. This time we were not so lucky, and the plunger, try as I might, would not fix it.

I googled "Proper Ways to Plunge a Toilet" to no avail. In case you need a plumber, according to some backwater internet University, I am fully qualified. My degree will arrive in 3-5 weeks, as soon as my $19.95 clears. I called on my memories of 4 years as a custodian at a Junior High school for my after school job when I was a teenager. I plunged and snaked plenty of toilets back then. Or coerced my friend Jory to do it for me. Ahem. Thanks Jory! But none of those toilets prepared me for this. My two little critters, My Twin Tornadoes did such a thorough job, I had to actually call my dad, and we had to remove the toilet and use pliers to get that giant jeep
 out of the bend of the toilet. Because the just wanted to prove, once and for all, that jeeps really can go anywhere you want them to go. It was really gross, and after two weeks I am just so happy to have a decent normal working toilet back!

It's the little things, you know?

It's the little people who cause the little things even more, though, you know?

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