When Mommy and Daddy Die in the Fire
Keith has been worrying me a bit lately.
He is inscesantly talking about a topic that I really don't like.
Nearly every day I hear:
"Mommy, when the house catches on fire and you and Daddy die and Grandma will come and put out the fire and save me and Faye and take us to live with her and we will be safe. That will be good, hu?"
I have tried and tried to explain to him that wouldn't be happening, but for some reason, no matter how many times I explain, he still goes on about it.
I think he became fixated on this topic a while back when I was trying to explain what an orphan was. I told him an orphan is someone who doesn't have a mommy or daddy. He asked what happened to their mommy and daddy. I told them sometimes they die. He asked how. I said maybe in a car accident, maybe they were sick, I didn't know. But I told him he didn't need to worry because nothing would ever happen to his mommy and daddy. And even if something did, he would still be safe because so many people love him, and someone else would take care of him, so he didn't need to worry.
I have no idea from where he got the idea of a fire! And quite honestly, it bothers me. I know it is just his little mind trying to make sense of things, but the fact that he talks about it constantly, and the fact that he talks like it is going to happen for sure, like it is set in stone. That just bothers me a bit.
Even writing about it makes me a little anxious. I guess I don't like to think of anything bad happening to anyone in my family.
We had another long talk about it today. I really hope it sticks this time, because I am very uncomfortable with my three year old talking about when I die, so matter of factly.
I have a lot to learn about being a good effective mother.
Sigh.
Comments
Good luck!
Doesn't really matter where he got it, the thing is that fire is probably his own idea of the scariest thing that could happen. It's good that he is able to take that a step farther and know he would be safe with family members. It shows he's secure and connected.
If I were you, I wouldn't try to talk him out of it, and I wouldn't spend time discussing it, either. Every time he said it, I would just say....You're right, Keith. No matter what happens, you will always be safe because so many people love you.
It'll pass. Don't let it spook you.
=)
So try not to worry too much about Keith. I'm sorry he has been so fixated. Harmon doesn't understand that people die. I'm not looking forward to that day when he does learn. Since I was so sick I had to be away from my kids for a whole day. It was sad Rachel cried Mamma all day. Families are so precious and like you I don't want to ever think about something hurting that.