The baby had not changed in her weight or height for a month. Not since the 22 of October. My midwife was a little worried. She said if there wasn't a change soon, she would have to induce me.
Did you know I wanted to go natural? Absolutely completely natural. I wanted to start on my own, and be completely under my own will power. Hearing that she would have to start me sent a cold fear through my body. Evidently, my baby possibly had something called IUGR (intra uterine growth restriction) which could cause a myriad of problems, the worst being a still birth. A still birth is one of my biggest fears.
So yesterday I went in to get checked, praying that my body had changed, that it had dilated on its own. If it had she wouldn't have to start me. At the appointment she gave me a choice. I could either have the baby yesterday, or I could have her on Monday.
We decided to have her yesterday.
So we decided my midwife would break my water, and if that didn't speed things along I would get the petocin. Did I mention I am terrified of the petocin? Yup. I am. As we were driving to Labor and Delivery I was terrified. Absolutely terrified. I wanted to go home and hide. I hadn't taken any birthing classes, nor had I been good about reading the books I should have. I checked them out from the library, but never really got the chance to read them. But I did read Jane Eyre and a few other books in the meantime, so it is completely my own fault I was scared.
We got checked in at about 10:30. I finished up the paperwork around 12:00 and Christy (my midwife) came in at 12:30 and broke my water. I was still dilated to a 4 and only 80% effaced. However when the nurse checked me, she said 80% was being very generous, she would say I was only a 60%. At any rate, the water gushed out, and Jeffrey and I decided to take a stroll through the hospital. I started to have the same little crampies I have been having since October. Nothing to even complain about.
And then, as we walked down a sunlight stained hall, the contractions hit. They really hit me. Hard. We hobbled back to the room where the wonderful nurse helped me through the contractions. They were about 2 minutes apart. Very soon after that they were about 10 seconds apart. When the nurse checked me I was 100% effaced and amazed at the pain. I didn't know it was possible to hurt so much.
But it didn't last long. Faye Emma was born at 2:03 yesterday afternoon.
To quote an ancient prophet
And oh, what ajoy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!
Yea, I say unto you, my son, that there could be nothing so exquisite and so bitter as were my pains. Yea, and again I say unto you, my son, that on the other hand, there can be nothing so exquisite and sweet as was my joy.
I think that about sums it up.
She is beautiful. She is perfect. She was born at 7 lbs 13 oz and 20 1/2 inches long. She has lots of dark brown hair and it looks like there is a slight curl in it. Her eyes are a beautiful blue color. Very different from Keith's when he was born. His eyes were a deep grey. Her eyes are a very light but beautiful blue. She has the same mouth as Keith, especially when she cries. I cannot believe how perfect she is and how gorgeous!
And again, I say, how exquisite is my joy!