Tuesday, July 21, 2009

The Invasion

Right now I have a favorite song:

"La cucaracha, la cucaracha, ya no puede caminar..."
(Translation: The cockroach, the cockroach, now it can't walk..."

I am obviously not a fan of creepy looking bugs. Spiders, don't bother me. Potato bugs, walking sticks, lady bugs, katydids, etc. bring it on, I am fine. Creepy bugs? Not happening!

Today I walked over to my sink to wash some dishes and saw a horrible black skinny body with lots of legs and long antennae running across a dish in the sink.

I am not afraid to admit it.

Yes, I screamed.

Yes, I dropped the dish I was holding.

Yes, I called Jeffrey and pleaded with him to come home right then, and to wash the dishes for me.

He said no.

I sucked up all my strength and went back to the kitchen, determined to disinfect the heck out of every surface and every square inch of that room. No one invades my house. No one. This is war.

I have seen how they creep in when they think you aren't looking. They are very subtle at first, hiding in dark recesses only coming out when they think you can't see them, foraging for any crumbs left out. *Shudder!*

Well, I am going to starve those suckers out! I will not share my house with any skinny bodied leachy bug! War, I tell you, War!

I guess I should share my extreme aversion to these horrible awful no good bugs (not that I need a reason to dislike them).

A story as related to me at many different family reunions:

When I was a kid we would go up to Bear Lake as a family. I remember one year I was sleeping on the deck and for some strange reason three of my older siblings decided to sleep in my sister's car. Mare and Dave were in the cab of the car, and they made Jon sleep in the trunk. While he was in there (with the trunk locked closed of course... because that is the kind of loving family I come from) they started to talk about the reason Beethoven went deaf. They said that there was a bug that climbed into his ears while he was asleep and ate into his brain. Looking back on the story now, I realize that it is simply ridiculous, but at the time we believed them. They then told Jon that they had a cup full of this same bug for fishing bait in the trunk and he should be careful to not tip it over as he would most likely end up with bugs eating his brains out just as Beethoven did.

Any guesses as to what this creature is?

Yup, you guessed it, the infamous earwig. Even looking at one gives me the willies!


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