I'm Not Afraid Anymore

It's late.

I should be asleep.

I know I will rue posting this late tomorrow morning.

I can't sleep because I have so much running through my head.

And my neighbor is listening to music very loud and I can feel and hear the vibrations very distinctly.

Today was a great day. I received a lot of courage and inspiration. The Boss gave me thousands of tight hugs and snotty nosed kisses. I made pizza for My Love - ready to eat when he walked through the door. We went on a "date" tonight by watching the 1980's version of Flash Gordon while cuddling and laughing at the cheesiness of it all. We cuddled a lot. We were happy. And I made a decision.

I want to always be happy. I need to stop hiding who I long to be. I have always been in love with the styles of the forties. I LOVE them. I love the hats, the gloves, the skirts, the colors, everything about that era. Today, after much thought, I decided I need to become the woman I have always wanted to be.

I have always been a timid person. I have been afraid to stand out and to do my own thing. Well not anymore. Now is the best time for me to be her. I want to wear the cute hats and gloves. I want to add color and pizazz to my life. I want to be so much more than I am, and I will.

I have visions of the DI and Savers flying through my mind. I have images of how I can decorate to have a beautiful dream house. I want to paint The Boss' room a pale green... something like a light mint green. I want to hang brightly colored pictures on his walls. I want to paint his bookshelf and spruce it up by adding a back to it. I am ready to be daring and add sauce to my life. I need my house to be as bright as the summer so even when I am cooped up in the winter I still have beautiful colors around me and I can still smell the vibrancy of the hot seasons. I love the heat.

I am already so much happier now! I have that old spring in my step and saucey twinkle in my eye. Just ask my husband. So now the question stands... who wants to go shopping with me?

Comments

Capt'n Amazing's wife said…
I'm pretty excited to paint my house too! I thought you guys were moving though...?
January 10, 2009 at 8:38 AM
* { Shannon } * said…
First off, I am always up for shopping (Ross is another great place to go for house decorations. I think they have cute & unique things and plus it's CHEAP!). Secondly, I think that CHOOSING to live a happier life is a perfect aspiration for 2009 ~ and for forever :)
January 10, 2009 at 9:34 AM
Noodle said…
I never thought that you were shy... when did that happen oh well way to go be the person you want to be. Don't yah just love snoty nose kisses there the best, My heans latly have had little burger residue right about two feet up. I love being a mom
January 10, 2009 at 8:52 PM
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