Sunday, October 12, 2014

My Soul Hungered

It is official!

Fall, I mean.  It is officially Fall now.

I know it has technically been Fall for a while now, but friends, today it is officially Fall!

And Friday, that day was officially Fall (more on that later) too, but today it was more so official.

To begin with, that incredible crisp red apple air was swirling around my house this morning.  I woke up and breathed so deeply, letting the air fill my soul with strength.  Because didn't you know, that is what this air does.  It is magic.  The magic of Autumn.

After church we got to go visit with Jeffrey's family.  While at his parent's house, the Hollow beckoned me with whisperings and promises of leaf crunching, stillness, and that magic air to fill my lungs and still my often turbulent mind.  I wished Jeffrey's brother a happy birthday, visited for a few minutes and then excused myself.  The siren's call of the Hollow was too strong, and I couldn't resist any longer.


I got to the trail head and contemplated which direction I should go.  I always go East, heading for the familiar beauty of the bridge, but decided this time, since I didn't have any children or a stroller to impede me, I would just wander and explore in places I have never ventured before.

And I did.

As I looked out at the glowing sepia tinted landscape, the wind making the waist high grasses bend and dance, a thought continually came to my mind.


And my soul hungered.

It hungered for this view.  My soul hungered for this peace. My soul hungered for this beauty.


The thought was a skipping CD, playing that line, that phrase over and over in my mind, ricocheting around the thoughts and feelings of my entire time spent in the Hollow.

And my soul was fed!


I wandered and marveled at the way the wind whispered through the leaves of the poplar trees, and the grass, sounding very much like a bunch of old gossips with new news to share.  The crickets and the cacophony of the birds was at times near deafening.


I marveled how the music of the air was so loud, and had my kids been there, I would have been focused on other things, and would have completely missed the sounds.

I trekked around the grass, into the brush, poking behind groves of trees, following the stream a ways. It was lovely.  I decided to explore the other side of the trail a bit.  I found a lovely spot, a ways away from the trail, but very much in sight of it still.  I mean, I could see it, but no one could see me.


I found a spot to sit and wished with all my heart I had brought my Emily Dickinson.  I don't know why, but she seems to compliment my mood perfectly when I am solitary in nature.  The passion and prose combined with nature can often be overwhelming.

I'll tell you how the Sun rose -
A Ribbon at a time -
The steeples swam in Amethyst
The news, like Squirrels, ran -
The Hills untied their Bonnets -
The Bobolinks - begun -
Then I said softly to myself -
"That must have been the Sun"!
But how he set - I know not -
There seemed a purple stile
That little Yellow boys and girls
Were climbing all the while -
Till when they reached the other side -
A Dominie in Gray -
Put gently up the evening Bars -
And led the flock away-
(Fr204)


Right?

So, I sat down in that quiet spot and longed for Dickinson and breathed magic in and listened.


The leaves falling were thunderous.  The birds jumping from branches or jumping around on the ground were deafening.  I couldn't stay in that spot long because I was looking for quiet, and it was impossible to find there.

So I wandered down, and walked.  I meandered over to the stream once more and found a soft place to sit.  A natural tepee made from fallen tree branches with a large log inside, perfect for sitting and musing, the seclusion and serenity were nearly tangible. A perfect spot to ponder the words of the scriptures, I decided. I pulled out my phone and opened up my scriptures, eager to just inhale the moment. Well, for the five minutes of battery life I had left anyway.  Regardless, it was absolutely lovely! And the heady smell of stream washed apples was very nearly inebriating to the senses.



When my phone suddenly died, I decided it was a good time to head back.

As I walked down the path, stripping the bark off the walking stick I found, my warm breath met the cool air and together fogged up my glasses.


I smiled, intoxicated by the way everything fell together so perfectly to feed my soul.

I may have gorged myself.


For this reason, I say, Autumn has finally fallen.

It is official!

1 comment:

Susan Anderson said...

Utah…and Emily…are so perfect in the fall. Loved this gorgeous imagery and text, Amy.

=)