Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Apologies and the Katydid


I am a weather stalker.  I think I have mentioned that before.  Which is a good thing, because it helps me feel prepared for whatever is coming.

Apparently, bad news is what's coming.

According to every place I look, today was the last nice day of the year.

And it was spent inside.

Tragedy, I know.

But with Beth not feeling well after her immunizations, I figured it would probably be better on her if we did stay home today.

And so today was exceptionally low key.

After getting lunch, the kids wanted to go play at the neighbor's.  I let Faye go, but Keith had some apologizing to do.  He was playing with some friends on Monday, they were wrestling, and he got a little bit out of control and wasn't as gentle as he should have been while wrestling with friends.  He was wrestling like he would with his Dad.  Not okay.  And so, we told him he couldn't play with any more friends until he had apologized to the boy he had been wrestling with.

He didn't want to.

He was embarrassed, ashamed, and afraid.  He didn't want to go over, but he really wanted to go play with Faye and her friend.

The problem solving boy that he is, he wrote a letter to his friend, telling him he was sorry.  His plan was to just leave it on the doorstep and call it good.  I told him the letter was a fine idea, but he needed to use his words and tell the boy himself that he was sorry.

And so, he sat down next to me, and sobbed.  Not just cried, sobbed.

He was so ashamed of losing control and didn't want to face the neighbors at all.  We talked about how the boy would probably react.  We talked about what would happen if Keith didn't apologize to him, how he would feel every time he saw someone from that family.  How he would feel when all the other kids were at that house playing without him.  Then we talked about doing scary things and confronting our fears.  I told Keith I would be with him today, and how sometimes doing the right thing is very scary, but when we do what is right, we are never alone.  Today I would be with him, but Heavenly Father is always with him, so if I am ever not able to be there to help him, he should know that he isn't alone still and he can gather courage and strength that way.

Keith agreed to go, but begged to wait until he finished crying.  Which of course I agreed to.

We went over, I knocked on the door, and Keith immediately said "Well, it looks like they aren't home.  We should go now."  I had to smile.  I knew how scary and hard this was for him.

They came to the door, and everything happened much as I predicted it would.  They were very forgiving and invited him over to play when the other kids got home from school.

He left very happy indeed.

And I forgot to send him over later.  Oops.

It did make me happy, though, that the kids played outside for most of the day.  That is a rare occurrence, especially if I am not out there forcing them to play.  I told them in the morning it would probably be the last nice day, and of their own volition, they took full advantage of it.

At one point, I heard Faye screaming.  It was a constant nearly no breath drawn continuous kind of scream so I sent Keith to investigate as I was feeding the baby.

A few moments later, Keith came running back into the house shouting excitedly, grabbed my hand and pulled me outside.  Luckily I had just finished feeding Beth, so I allowed myself to be led.  We went out to the trampoline, and there was one of the most fascinating bugs to me.

The Katydid.

I love that bug, I always have.  Especially because they are so rare to see.

After admiring it for a while, I went inside to cook dinner, and the kids stayed out, playing.

When dinner was ready, Keith came in, and Faye stayed out on the trampoline.  She began screaming again. I poked my head out the door and asked her what the problem was.  She was afraid the katydid would bite her or pinch her.  And then we saw lightening.  Rule number 1: if there is lightening in the sky, no one plays on the trampoline.  She decided she was more afraid of the lightening than the katydid, and ran inside.  Good girl.  Then she stood at the window, watching the rain come down, and wished the lovely green bug could find a dry place to hide.

Despite staying home, it was quite an adventurous day.

4 comments:

*Jess* said...

apologizing is so hard when you are embarrassed! He did well, though :)

Emmy said...

You are a good mama, it is so hard to say your sorry but yes so important to learn now-- oh and make sure you swing by my blog today ;)

Sue said...

Good job, Mom! On the parenting AND on the post.

=)

Confessions of a PTO Mom said...

I was with my littlest and my biggest a few weeks ago at a farmers market. On the way back to my truck I ran over one of those bugs with my big stroller wheels. I have a smooshed up picture, because I was't sure what it was. But it's nearly identical to what you posted. Just smooshed.