Tuesday, December 27, 2011

The Other Side of Christmas

I remember being a child.  Probably around ten years old.  I could not wait for Christmas to come.  I remember the excitement that kept me awake every night for weeks leading up to that wonderful day.

This year, I had that same excitement, but for very different reasons.  I could not wait for Christmas to come so it could be over with.  The sleepless nights due to stress caused by the mountain of gifts I needed to make.  I just wanted it to be over with.  I wanted to be able to sit back and enjoy the season with my family.  But yet again, the stress stepped in and took over.  Such a rude visitor.  It keeps me up all night, makes my house a mess, and turns me into a grump.

To combat, I tried listening to Christmas music.  But quite honestly, this year the Christmas music did not make me happy.  Every time I turned on the radio, I became very distracted and annoyed.  I didn't want to hear about Rudolph, or shoes or any of that other rubbish.  I wanted to hear about that special night so long ago.  I wanted to be uplifted because the birth of the Savior was the most important birth to have ever happened.  That ever will happen.  I wanted to focus on the beauty and simplicity of it all.  All the fringe just irked me that much more.

One day, a few weeks before Christmas I headed out to pick up supplies for gifts.  It was snowing, and lovely. While driving, I encountered several red lights.  I tried to break, but unfortunately the breaks had gone out.  I mean, I slid, even though I was tapping the breaks.  It was quite terrifying.  I was eventually able to slow down, and gingerly tried the breaks again.  If I was gentle, they would stop me.  But only if I was going 5 mph.  Sigh.  I tell you, the kids and I prayed loud and long the rest of that car ride.  I turned in to the first car repair place I could find.  Not a fun day.  But, we were safe.  That is what mattered, right?

Now that Christmas is over, I sit, deliberating over all my spare time.  I could be taking down the decor.  I could be picking up a few of the big projects that were placed on the back burner.  Instead, I relish in the nothingness that is required of me.  Glory be I can breathe again!

3 comments:

Trish said...

I am totally with you! Well, at least about the doing nothing when there is so much to do. I think I just need a major "pick me up" if anything is to be expected of me in the near future. Fortunately I finally got a job and being able to earn some money and pay down more debt will really lift me up! Yay!

Lisa said...

Scary little situation you found yourself in. Glad you are ok. As for the spirit of Christmas - I actually had a really good year this year. But due to a very sad occurrence. I lost one of my best friends and it jarred me to remembrance of what this life is really all about. Anyway - glad you are finally able to relax!

Sue said...

I always feel a sense of relief once Christmas has successfully been pulled off. And also, a bit of a letdown.

Then I perk up and go on to New Year's!

=)